Comfort

Snuggling with a loved one, reading a book, going out to eat, or whatever you like, we all want to be comfortable. The body and mind crave a state of homeostasis. This is a good thing unless you are unhappy. 

Habits are difficult to break. Most of our habits are fairly unconscious. We don’t even know that we do them. This perpetuation of the norm may be the reason why you are unhappy. You fear change. You need to find comfort in the act of improving your well being. Do you want to be more social? Do you have trouble when speaking with a group? Do you bite your nails? Maybe you want to start eating healthy. If your habits are keeping you unhappy then it’s time to build new habits. Whatever you do that you may want to change isn’t as difficult to do as you think. 

It takes about 21 days to build a habit.  Dont focus on trying to break old habits, that is a very uphill battle when it’s been decades in the making. Build a new habit to overwrite the old ones. Address the habit you wish to change, set a plan for the new habit, and the begin to execute. Your new habit will begin to take root with time and soon that will be the norm. 

Day one will be the most difficult. Taking a look at yourself and decided what in your life needs to be changed. What is causing you to be unhappy? After you are done taking out the things that make you unhappy in your life. You are only left with happiness. 

The meaning

To be happy and to bring happiness into your life you need to know what it is. For each of us this can be different and may even be tangible or intangible. You may already know what makes you happy and some of us may not. 

If you already know what makes you happy then your focus should be to eliminate the things in your life that takes that happiness away from you. This may be people you associate with that consistently bring your mood down. It may be job you dont like going to. It could even be a problem in your life that needs to be dealt with that you keep putting off. Whatever brings your happiness level down you must first acknowledge it, accept that it is an issue, then you can properly address it. Once this is done you can focus on brining your happiness to the forefront of your life. 

For those of us that have trouble identifying what brings us happiness that is our first task. We must take the time to look at our life and decern what makes us happy. Think about your day, what do you do that you take enjoyment in?  Is there a specific activity you enjoy doing? Is there a person you enjoy being with? What makes you happy? Once you figure out what makes you happy, you should spend more time doing it. This should go without saying but alot of people tend to neglect themselves and what makes us happiest. 

Take some time to really think about what makes you. Look at yourself, look at your life, and be happy. 

Mirror

Most people have a very negative self image. Whether we were teased growing up or we try and compare ourselves to other. We look into the mirror and see only negatives: I have acne, I have a big nose, I’m overweight, and whatever else. Not only is this a horrible way to start the day it only perpetuates itself and becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

 When you get up in the morning, remember Happiness is a choice. Look into that mirror and talk to yourself. Self talk is such a strong influencer. We should all look in the mirror and see someone we can be proud of. No one has been through what you have been through and no one controls how you feel but you. When you wake up, look into that mirror and say out loud, “Today, I choose to be happy.” Be better then you were yesterday. If you have acne, wash your wash with a new cleanser. If you are overweight and want to change, go to the gym or prepare some meals for the week. What if your unhappy with the size of your nose? Know that the specific trait you have is original and no one else has a trait quite like that. Learn to love your originality. Choose to be happy. Look at yourself, you are great just the way you are. Keep telling yourself that and that will be your new self fulfilling prophecy.  

Remember, Happiness is a choice. 

Saying No

The word “No is so very powerful. It does not need a reason or an explanation. 

When your goal is choose happiness the word No can be your best friend. Do you want to go, can you do me a favor, can I borrow, and whatever else people may question you for, if they are not in your best interest, just say no. They most likely will ask for an explanation if the form of ” Why not?” All you have yo do is say that you don’t want to do that. Most of us feel obligations towards those that we are close to and will assist however we can even if it is a detriment to our happiness.  We would rather sacrifice in our own life then to have someone else judge us for not doing something. 

Stop caring what others think about you. Be you, be the best version of you that you can be. True friends will accept you for who you are and others will slowly fall away. Let them. Fake people who are only around you for the things that you can do for them are not the type of people that you want to associate with. If you have to choose between doing something for them and choosing happiness, you are better off being happy. 

Toxic people

When you want to be happy you need to surround yourself with things that make you happy. 

We all have a friends, family, and people In our lives that we surround ourselves with everyday. Matthew Kelly said “The people we surround ourselves with either raise or lower our standards.” My standard for life is quite high. I expect alot out of myself and so should you. Why would you want to keep people around who do nothing but complain about everything. These people are toxic to your mental well being.  If you are having a great day, these people are the type to find one simple aspect of your day to try and bring you down to their level. They can not stand for you or anyone around them to be happy. 

These people need to be kept at a distance. When you choose to be happy you need to keep like minded friends. Friends who build you up and whom you can do the same. If you can not keep them at a distance and they are able to bring you down, you may want to really consider if they are a friend worth having. Think, how are they affecting my happiness? Would you be better off with a different kind of person in your life? 

Family is a part of your life from the beginning and they have helped mold your view of happiness.  Most of us would say that we had a nice childhood. Take a look at your family, not as a whole but as individuals. Are they happy? Are they pleasant to be around? Are they good for your happiness? 

Choosing Happiness isn’t always easy but once you make the decision to choose be to happy you will see a better life ahead of you. 

First Things First

The sound of your alarm or the ring of your phone starts most people’s day. You take stock of how you’re feeling, whether you slept well or not, what you want to eat or what you have to accomplish that day.  Why can’t we choose what kind of day it is going to be?

One day I decided to choose to be happy and have a great day. No matter what I had to do, no matter who I interacted with, no matter what happened I was going to choose to be happy. We have all heard the saying, “When it rains it pours.” This seems to only apply to the bad things in life. Today it is going to apply to the good things as well.  I will jave a good day a d even more good things will happen to me.